My name is David. I live in Singapore, but I do not love it. Instead, I love New York City. I want to become a fashion photographer, but I'm stuck serving in the military. I also love Steven Klein and Lara Stone. Wish me luck for my SATs!
www.davidchan.sg
Catching Elephant is a theme by Andy Taylor
This past weekend I went to a party on Saturday night. It was the birthday party of this guy whose studio we always use when I used to assist before enlisting. It was semi-weird, mostly “industry” people, and most of whom I don’t know. Still, it was nice to see the people I did know again.
There’s always this small group of horrible people who will always see you as an assistant and talk to you pretty rudely, though. For example, this dude asks me what I’m doing and I tell him I’m an arms technician. And he looks at me all disgusted and goes, “Cushy.”
Last warning.
But whatever. I’m so tired today. I went to see Scissor Sisters last night and had such a great time dancing my butt off and hanging out. It was so much fun! I was so close to the front, no complaints at all!
Today, though, I’m just sad. Can’t explain it. Well, I mean, I guess I can. But instead of explaining it, I’m just going to go put Adele’s 19 on repeat.
Everybody thinks I’m crazy! But I’m the only one who knows I’m right. I can’t stop getting into fights. I’m getting super sick of everybody and these days all I want to do is read. Reading is great because everyone else disappears.
I’m really tired, so even though I’m getting into things where people get mad with me, I could care less. “Friends” is such a stupid concept. I’m so exhausted, I don’t even want to think about it. There’s so much work. I just want to disappear.
I’m not happy, and I haven’t been in forever.
I went for dinner earlier with a friend and then walked home. I usually would have taken a bus so I’m calling it my “depression walk”. I listened to Patty Griffin the entire walk home and it was amazing. It made me feel better. I still don’t have any answers to any of my questions, but what I know is that it’s gonna be okay.
In case I needed to specifically state it, I’m stuck in military service right now. And not by choice!
I’m so fucking tired of going to camp every single day and dealing with these weird ass superficial people I’m supposed to be friends with. I mean, I’m probably an asshole for saying this, and most of them can’t help it, but I can’t stand 99% of the people I come into contact with.
They’re all so fucking generic. They love soccer. They went to Singapore Polytechnic. They all think Johnny English is THE MOST AMAZING film they’ve EVER seen in their lives. They put loud stickers on their cars. They think having a car gives them permission to be douchebags. They love kissing regulars’ butts. And they THINK people actually love them. Imagine that.
I mean, really. They’re all so shallow and just want to talk/joke about how much sex they’ve had with girls that are how young. Or take stabs at teasing other people about the most minor of faults. They never have any conversations deeper than “my girlfriend blah blah blah” or “my friends don’t wanna hang out with me, blah blah blah”. And it kills me! The worst part is, most of them are like 1, 2, 3 years older than me. I mean, come on. Grow the fuck up.
Maybe it’s just that I’m really sick of boring people. It sounds rude when I write about it like that, but whatever. Where I’m from, people always tried really hard to stand out. And I guess that was annoying too cause everyone thought they were so damn special, but at least it was interesting. People didn’t all love the same boring things.
People are obsessed with television shows. I mean, sure, “How I Met Your Mother” isn’t the worst show in the world, but why are people so obsessed with it? You’re not really a hipster living in New York City. Wake up boys, this is Singapore.
And everytime someone wants to do something remotely selfish (because, really, who cares), people are all like, what about BROS, blah blah blah. I’ve never even HEARD the word “bro” before coming to army. Isn’t that the DOUCHIEST word EVER?????
Also, people who whine about their girlfriends. This isn’t 2003 anymore, BRO. Stop going, “Are you gonna come to my funeral?” just because a girl doesn’t wanna talk to you. I mean, REALLY.
And surrounding myself with these people is so fucking painful. It’s killing me every single day and all I want to do is curl up in a ball and die. Help me.
Distance. I just need some fucking distance.
